Sextus is a no-no.

It’s a rather controversial issue all around, but very much so inside the Roman Catholic Church: the celibacy of priests. I am by no means a scholar on the issue, nor do I want to be, and I wouldn’t normally be writing on this topic at all if not for a funny anecdote and recent highlights in the media about conversions.

Nunc et in hora mortis nostrae

An old friend of my ex-husband, S—, committed suicide on January 3. I wasn’t particularly close to him, in fact, his friend often argued with me over our differing ideologies of religion. My heart, nevertheless, is saddened.

If you don’t doubt, you won’t grow

It’s as simple as that: if you have faith and you don’t doubt, you aren’t human.

The way we believe in God should and must vary at different times in our lives. Even if that means doubting his existence.

Not Quite the Walking Dead

I haven’t posted much lately because I’ve been insanely busy with work, play, and volunteerism, which is the culmination of both work and play.  I have a draft saved of some reflection on God’s word, but my heart wasn’t it in when I jotted it down.  I need to reorganize it.

I am exhausted physically, but very energized mentally and spiritually.  Therefore, I am not quite the walking dead.  My spirit is sustaining me.

Fr. Kim’s Thought

Just a quick jot-down of an anecdote Fr. John Kim was explaining in regards to the study of Luke 13 and the “who will get saved?” question:

“I was approached by a young man who could obviously tell I was a Catholic priest.  He said to me, ‘Father, I used to be Catholic when I was young man, but I was put off by the [Catholic] Church’s nonconformity with contemporary life.  There were too many rules and it’s just too difficult to be Catholic.  It’s not user-friendly.’  And he went on to list his grievances with the Church.  I replied to him, ‘You’re right.  The Church is not very user-friendly.  It is very difficult to be Catholic.  But ‘user-friendly’ implies that it should conform to life and be life-friendly.  It is not life-friendly, it is Christ-friendly.  And if in the end of times, I am to be judged by whether I was friendly to life or friendly to Christ, I would rather choose Christ-friendly.’”

I will write more about my reaction to Luke 13 after I listen and reflect on Luke 14 this coming week.  Luke 13 obviously tells us that the belief in Christ is not enough to save you eternally.  Jesus plainly says to those who claim that ”they ate with him while He taught in their streets” that “I do not know you.”  Luke 14 tells us how to be saved. . . how to really comprehend what  Jesus was teaching, not just knowing His name.

Reflection on Luke 10: Christ the Samaritan

My parish priest gave an excellent homily this week and made great justifications on natural law.  This week’s gospel centered around the one question that we must all ask ourselves in our lives:  what happens when I die? 

If Your Right Eye Offends

 If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than to have your whole body thrown into Gehenna.

And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of

your members than to have your whole body go into Gehenna.  (Matt. 5:29-30)

This is the verse that my priest reminded me of during my last face-to-face confession. 

In the Darkness

What a week of such repentence and such beauty!  Tonight, I attended a Tenebrae service at my church. 

In His Presence

Pope John Paul II with Monstrance

Amidst my internal struggle with all that’s been happening in the last few weeks, I randomly took my priest’s advice and just sat near the Eucharist in the adoration chapel of my church last night for Christ’s company.  I cried a little, but felt rejuvenated in my strength.   Why is it that I was doing so well before and now I’m so weak?  I tried to block my own thoughts and just sit quietly, listening for guidance.   I did feel a lot better when I left, but I have to admit, I was very scared to come home and I’m not sure why.

I’m trying to find things to keep my mind occupied when I’m not already committed to doing other things.  That’s why it’s scary, because my own thoughts seem to betray what my spirit wills.

Tonight is My Last Night as a ___!

Tonight I remain still married, but tomorrow morning I no longer will be.  When my husband told me about this, I held my tears back, but sobbed violently when he left.  I wish I could have cried before him, but I don’t know why I wish that.

Tomorrow a new adventure begins.